It is sad a time to be a government employee in the Philippines these days. It’s not that I am not proud of the work I do but because I am embarrassed by the non-stop controversies that the government is facing these days. It has come to a point that the whatever honest work some or most of the small workers have done and are still doing, it becomes easily forgotten because of the big mistakes committed by a certain few.
I shared before in my FB account a letter by a South Korean who claimed that one of the reasons that the Philippines is not progressing is Filipinos are too doubtful of their system and instead of trying to remain in the country to initiate changes, many choose to leave. I posted an insight to the article saying I shared the sentiments of that writer and how I have repeatedly wondered why I am always being told that my skills as a scientist would be wasted here and that I would be better off in another country. Also, I choose to believe that there is still a very big hope in the Philippines.
However, with the recent events unfolding in the Philippines—the Php 10 billion PDAF scam, the Mamplaya fund scam, and now the Disbursement Acceleration Program (DAP) controversy—I cannot help but sigh. I guess it’s a no brainer now why many of the people here have lost hope. It’s so disheartening to watch the news these days knowing that the people involved in these controversies are the very same people who I am working with, albeit indirectly, in the system. Also, how can I believe what they are claiming now when they are the very same people who are pushing for fiscal transparency and tuwid na daan?
More than these doubts, I think what is more hurting is because of the selfishness of a few, every government employee is now labeled as dishonest, liar, or a thief. I know I should I not be afraid because I have nothing to hide but how I can I walk confidently when I am already being stoned even if I haven’t done anything that deserves stoning?
I am now asking myself whether I still carry the same kind of optimism I had when I started in government service. I am also chewing my own tongue because the thought of seeking for opportunities abroad has repeatedly entered my mind the past weeks. Whatever these controversies lead to.. may it be to an improved Philippines, to even more scandals, or to me leaving the government service, there are two things I am certain about… I refused to be the kind of person who plays with the efforts made by others in favor of his/her own good, and I do not claim what is not mine. I wish certain ones up there can say the same thing about themselves.